Getting it when you lose

Ekrem Dumanlı

Years ago, Zaman’s editorial board was having a regular brainstorming session in Ankara’s Kızılcahamam. As usual, we invited an influential political figure to one session of the meeting.

Our motivation was to hear an insider’s account of what was going on on the political stage. For no reason, he changed the subject to the Gülen movement, leveling meaningless and extreme criticism against this community. It was neither the proper place nor the proper time for such criticism. Besides, his accounts bore no relevance to the paper’s content. However, hospitality to our guests was our responsibility. We just listened to him. Some of our friends wanted to intervene, but the moderator did not let them speak because just as the destructive criticisms from people who are not related to the subject matter seek to remove stones from the wall, counter-criticisms can also be damaging. We had to listen to these criticisms anyway…

Our guest of honor was so surprised by our attitude that he had to ask, “Won’t you respond to my criticisms?” There was no response to give. And there was no need to. Smiling, he asked, “Are you offended?” Obviously, he was uncomfortable with this unpleasant atmosphere. Maybe he wanted to learn what we were thinking. In response to his insistence, I said: “You will understand the value of our friendship when you lose it.” He stared at me with surprise. He told me, “This [hurtful remark] was huge.” And this time, we were upset. But this sentence actually expressed the reality and truth.

Actually life is all about a thin line drawn between possession and losing; is that not right? It is not easy to appreciate the days of youth without actually losing them. We are not aware of the value and perfection of our body system before we lose our health. People who have media fame and reputation often fail to realize that they are actually alienated and isolated within the crowds. In conclusion, most of the time, we fail to understand before death that every second in our life is actually very valuable.

Excerpt from the column published on Sunday's Zaman, 08 July 2012, Sunday